Warning Signs of
Relationship Violence

Pay Attention to Cues When You Are Getting to Know Someone

• Emotionally abuses you (insults, belittling comments, ignoring you, acting sulky or angry when you initiate an action or idea).
• Tells you who you may be friends with, how you should dress, or tries to control other elements of your life or relationship.
• Talks negatively about women in general.
• Gets jealous when there is no reason.
• Drinks heavily, uses drugs, or tries to get you drunk.
• Berates you for not wanting to get drunk, get high, have sex, or go with him to an isolated or personal place.
• Refuses to let you share any of the expenses of a date and gets angry when you offer to pay.
• Is physically violent to you or others, even if it's "just" grabbing and pushing to get his way.
• Acts in an intimidating way toward you by invading your "personal space" (sits too close, speaks as if he knows you much better than he does, touches you when you tell him not to).
• Is unable to handle sexual and emotional frustrations without becoming angry.
• Does not view you as an equal--because he's older or sees himself as smarter or socially superior.
• Thinks poorly of himself and guards his masculinity by acting tough.
• Goes through extreme highs and lows, is kind one minute and cruel the next.
• Is angry and threatening to the extent that you have changed your life so as not to anger him.

Last updated: 10/05

Next: Are you vulnerable to being date-raped??

Last reviewed: 10/05

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